Escapist F.C.

Denouement

2009-12-08T22:46:00.001-08:00

So, you know?

Apparently Boey found out, who told Dian, who told you. But i digress. The chain of events is trivial; though the result is anything but.

I'm glad, really. Bittersweetly glad. If you hadn't found out, no doubt in the years to come I would have been tormented by what-ifs. That way madness lies. But now I know that you know. And silence is as good an answer as any i guess. Clear-cut. Unambigious. Coldly frank.

Tis' said that it is in Man to strive for the unattainable. Admittedly, I do not profess to be Neil Armstrong. But can I really be blamed for liking a girl so out of my league? For I do not regret it. I am a different person from when you first walked into my life, and I freely attribute it to you. To think that I was actually afraid of not knowing what love is, in my secondary school years.

Here's a song lyric that I find befits the occasion. It's from "If You're Not The One", by Daniel Bedingfield.

"I don't wanna run away, but I can't take it, I don't understand! If I'm not made for you then why does my heart tell me that I am? Is there any way that I can stay, in your arms?"

Apparently not. Adieu, A.

This, incidentally, will be the final post on this blog. The Saga does not Begin, but Ends.

A Letter

2009-10-08T07:35:00.000-07:00

I saw you sitting at the astroturf steps today after the History paper review. The range was long, about from the car barriers to your seat, but there's no mistaking your profile, posture... or the almost ubitiquous novel in your lap.

You were watching a group of Year 5s playing soccer. Or at least from what I could see. For minute or so, you were intently scanning the constantly shifting cloud of players as though searching for something, or someone. After a time, your gaze dropped back to your book, and your conciousness into the world of the author.

Dare I hope?

I must admit, it's quite unlikely. For the past two years you have never really intimated any interest towards myself, and i similarly have never really dared entertain my own hopes of getting such a response. For a girl such as yourself; beautiful, intelligent, cute, and graceful; my interest,if at all perceptible, would most likely be lost amidst a crowd of others, some or most of which are more desirable than myself. As such, I have never dared to steel myself and confess my long-held secret; of a desperate, hopeless love for you.

I guess it all started when you walked into my life in that sky-blue SCGS uniform and with that truly unique hairstyle (the one with the two little plaits). I was caught then, though i did not yet know it. Love, of the romantic variety was, and is, a relatively new concept to one growing up in the monastic world of an all-boys' school. I dismissed it as a crush, one caused by not seeing a girl of any sort for four years. It would fade away swiftly, like the other crushes I had and developed along the way. I was partially correct.

They faded, but not this. Even now, I dare not meet your eyes, lest you catch a glimpse of the tumultous emotions behind these purported windows to the soul. When you smile, and laugh in that wonderfully carefree, eyes-shut uninhibited way, you still have the same effect on me. My heart still gladly sells itself into servitude for the next century or so.

Perhaps you're surprised? I don't blame you. I feared rejection from you, above all else, and hence never really dared to do anything beyond dropping a hint or two. Rejection, no matter how tactful, would shatter my castles in the air as surely as any hollow charge. So would the attempts to avoid me for fear of awkwardness. Even now, as our time in the same school draws to a close, I will not, CAN not, confess without at least an inkling of your reaction. A 'no' would break me. It is telling, perhaps, that the best conversation I had with you was in my sleep. You were smiling at something I said, in that damnably endearing way of yours.

I was never so disappointed to wake up.

Honours Day

2009-08-28T09:03:00.000-07:00

Congrats, you've gotten an award
I was watching, up on the balcony
As you slowly, almost hesitantly,
Walk along the stage
And accept your certificate demurely

It's funny how different you look
Almost different, all the way down there
Or perhaps I'm just not used to
Seeing you from a higher perspective
Unless it was on a stair

There's an almost gangly look to you
And then there's that nervous gait
Making you seem like one of those
Just-birthed foals, wobbling, and
Stumbling, and finally standing straight

It's strange; after all
You'd think you would be used to
Being under the stares of everyone by now
Given what your award was for
You should be immune to the perusal of a school

I think I prefer you close up
From afar, your power to
Make my heart beat faster
Reduce my speech to a stutter
Seems rather diluted too

Yes, most defintely
Better, indeed, to stay close
That lovely smile, and
Those arresting eyes, and
That delicate nose...

Oh most high and futile it is
For men to strive for the unattainable
Is it my fault that I was shot
straight through the heart
When I first saw that girl

I clapped for you, my
Palms ringing emptily for an instant
My friend was tactful enough
I dunno if you heard though
Or if it mattered whether you did or didn't.

Random

2009-08-07T07:52:00.000-07:00

after like half an hour in G2000 i has found a longsleeved shirt that i actually look good in and fits me. The quest is complete.

So Much For My Happy Ending

2009-08-01T07:25:00.000-07:00

Just watched Freaky Friday and it's awesome! I mean I caught on to the movie premise despite watching only for 5 mins and half way through and, wow! The plot was great, the music was great, the humor was great. <3 Disney.

I think life should be more like a Disney Movie. Everyone's all safely stereotyped, you know the ending's going to be happy, there's plenty of music, humor, and drama. Even the embarassing moments in life are laugh-out-loud, cover-your-face types and you know it works out just fine in the end. Oh, and the protagonist always gets the love interest whom he/she's always secretly liked and whom he/she's totally suited for. Yeah.

Yeah I know it's totally high school to like disney movies. To that i say, well suck it up, motherf***er i can swear like a sailor and with the best of em'. I just feel that the adult world we're entering is cruel, uncaring and heartless. I know, cos' my parents always tell stories about it. It's like a combat report, sometimes. And there's not always a happy ending, and you might not get the girl you love. Avril gets it right in her song 'My Happy Ending':

Let's talk this over
It's not like we're dead
Was it something I did?
Was it something you said?

Don't leave me hangin'
In a city so dead
Held up so high
On such a breakable thread

[Pre-Chorus:]
You were all the things I thought I knew
And I thought we could be

[Chorus:]
You were everything, everything that I wanted
We were meant to be, supposed to be
But we lost it (but we lost it)
All of the memories, so close to me
Just fade away
All this time you were pretending
So much for my happy ending

Oh oh, oh oh
So much for my happy ending (Oh oh, oh oh)

Oh oh, oh oh

You've got your dumb friends
I know what they say
They tell you I'm difficult
But so are they (So are they)
But they don't know me
Do they even know you? (Even know you)
All the things you hide from me
All the shit that you do (All the shit that you do)

You were all the things I thought I knew
And I thought we could be

[Chorus:]
You were everything, everything that I wanted
We were meant to be, supposed to be, but we lost it
all of the memories, so close to me, just fade away
All this time you were pretending
So much for my happy ending

It's nice to know that you were there,
Thanks for acting like you cared
And making me feel like I was the only one
It's nice to know we had it all
Thanks for watching as I fall
And letting me know we were done

[Chorus:]
He was everything, everything that I wanted
We were meant to be, supposed to be, but we lost it
And all of the memories, so close to me, just fade away
All this time you were pretending
So much for my happy ending...

[Chorus:]
You were everything, everything that I wanted
And we were meant to be, supposed to be, but we lost it
And all of the memories, so close to me, just fade away
All this time you were pretending
So much for my happy ending

Oh oh, oh oh
So much for my happy ending
Oh oh, oh oh
So much for my happy ending

Oh oh, oh oh, oh oh....
Oh ooooh....

So is it so bad to refuse to grow up? To sit in the empty class on the very last day of school, the very last paper, refusing to go home and leave the school which has been a home away from home for 6 years? Let the others go and celebrate. They'll regret it ten, twenty years down the road. These are the best days of our lives.

Besides it's not as if it's easy for me to grow up (apart from the ageing thing). I mean, I'm like an 18 year old trapped in the body of a 14 year old. -.-. My one pair of white chinos whcich actually fit me are meant for boys that age range. Ditto my goalkeeping gloves, even. It's also ridiculously hard to get adult shoes that fit me; i went shopping for dress shoes yesterday, and there were only a handful of size 6 shoes and hundreds of 7,8,9 shoes, all looking unbelivably cool and glossy and <3 but ARGHH. Same for football jerseys; i have this fantastic Barcelona jersey in my closet that was a bargain but which is about 238932892 sizes too large. I think I'll give it to Sam Teo. And besides I look like a boy trying to play dressup with his dad's clothes when i dress my age.

So screw growing up. Mr Kishor said to my mum that I don't act my age, so I'm not going to dress my age either. I'm going to dress like a 14-16 year old; t-shirts and berms/shorts+sandals because they look good on me. I tried this today and I got second looks from girls. (They're about 4 years too young for me, but that's not the point).

I'm so gonna die for prom <3.

You Ain't Seen Nothing

2009-07-25T06:28:00.000-07:00

Ideally this is a screamo/rap(except for chorus)/punk rock kinda song. The last line of the non-chorus are meant to said/screamed really fast.

I dedicate this song to my Year 5 past self.

You Ain't Seen Nothing

'Sup Year 5s, how's it going?
7 months in, and no sign of slowing
Are you faltering or starting to sweat
Well fasten your seatbelts cos you ain't seen nothing yet!

Cos'
Year 6's pure hell, oh yes it's true
And if you disagree then fuck you
Demerit points are the only reason your year
even need to come to school
And the quicker you realise that the sooner you'll es-tee-eff-youuu

You haven't started EE, yet you're complaining
That IB's keeping you up, and it's irritating
You haven't realised, failed to understand
Your load's nothin' till you sleep at 4 am!

Cos'
Year 6's pure hell, oh yes it's true
And if you disagree then fuck you
Demerit points are the only reason your year
even need to come to school
And the quicker you realise that the sooner you'll STFU

Spare a thought for us, when you cry to your mother
(We've) major exams a few months apart, one after another
I do believe, and this may sound kinda crass
It'll be 2010 till ya' get your head outta your ass!

Cos'
Year 6's pure hell, oh yes it's true
And if you disagree then fuck you
Demerit points are the only reason your year
even need to come to school
And the quicker you realise that the sooner STFU

Cos'
Year 6's pure hell, oh yes it's true
And if you disagree then fuck you
Demerit points are the only reason your year
even need to come to school
And the quicker you realise that the sooner you'll STFU
STFU
STFU
STF...U.

In Soviet Russia

2009-07-07T22:11:00.000-07:00

The old woman sat in a wicker chair by the window overlooking the dingy street outside her dacha. Her mouth quirked upwards (noone really smiled nowadays) as a sleek matte black Zhiguli, trailed by another, turned the corner and started down the road. As the doorbell rang she was already at the door.

Hello son, she said.

The stocky man in the doorway merely grunted, shrugging off his great coat. He barked orders to his bodyguards, whereupon two followed him into the cold, poorly heated house, while the others fanned out around the dacha's environs outside, stamping their feet against the cold.

I wish you'd leave these two outside as well, dear. Given your popularity, what on earth would you be worried about? This last was said with more than a trace of sarcasm that the man ignored.

A man can't be too careful nowadays, he said brusquely, choosing to take the remark at face value.

Indeed. Coffee?

The usual.

She poured two steaming mugs of coffee, and offered some to the stoic bodyguards who had just quietly reentered the kitchen. She knew that they had surrepitously reconiteered her house while she had been busy with the kettle and the tin of coffee powder. Another parent would have been offended, but she knew her son too well.

So, how have you been? said the man sitting opposite her. She knew that he really didn't care one way or another.

I hear you've been more concerned with yourself lately.

How do you mean? He said sharply.

She nonchalantly sipped from her mug as she said Word is that you're arresting all the Jewish doctors...

Where did you get that information?

Rumors travel faster than one of your MiGs. What are you planning?

He snorted. Planning? Nothing. It's just that Beria...

Beria? That disgusting little man...

He serves a purpose, all right?

Your purpose...

The purpose of the Soviet Union!

I thought they were one and the same. Or at least, that's what the newsreels say.

Ignoring the barb, he continued; Beria has uncovered a massive plot among the Jewish medical community to assasinate me. We're merely rounding up all the Semite doctors as a precaution...

Does the precaution involve purging them as well?

He blinked. If necessary. Once their guilt has been established...

Something which you have had little problem with in the past. I still remember Bukharin...

Bukharin was plotting to overthrow me!

She looked at him sadly. Oh son, you see spies, assasins and plots everywhere you look. In your quest for self-protection, you have slain millions of innocents. You have become a monster.

This visit is over! ,he raged. Grabbing his coat, he made for the door, his bodyguards scrambling to keep up. As he slammed the door, he heard faintly: Repent, son. Repent before it's too late.

End of Part 1; edits to follow.

Venetian Blinds

2009-06-22T05:09:00.001-07:00

Any resemblance to Anthony Horowitz's Scorpia is entirely, entirely coincidental.

Mr Schuholtz raced along the edge of the canal, ignoring the stares of curious Venetians and, with greater difficulty, the picturesque old-world charm of the city that rose around him. Clutching the Stasis Ward with sweaty hands close to him, he desperately sought a place of refuge.

Beautiful it may be, thought he, but it's too damn open. He was pinned between the water and the residences of families who had undoubtedly stayed there for centuries. After all, there was little land left in all Venice, and new buildings were out of the question. Nor could they build upwards; lest the city might sink like a paper boat laden with rocks. Besides, global warming was going to do the job sooner rather than later, so why hasten the inevitable? Hence, nobody moved house in Venice...

Back to the present, old man, he chided himself. He chanced a glance over his shoulder. For a elating moment, he thought that he had lost his pursuers, but a patch of disturbance caught his eye.

So, the Heavy One and the Noisy One are still on the chase, he sighed. He knew that they were young and fit, while he was , while not approaching the end of his days, still on the wrong side of fifty. If he remained on the straight and narrow stretch he would soon be overtaken. Yet the buildings to his left, and the water to his right, did not afford him many options.

The water...

To his right and in front of him, a large ferryboat was manuvering itself away from the canal walls, casting off its mooring lines. Tourists sat under the shaded tarp, conversing and admiring the view Without missing a beat, he altered his path towards the stone steps that led away and down from the pedestrian pathway to the calm waters of the canal.

It was too late. The rudderman at the rear had cast off his last line, and the boat started to move. Away.

'Por favor, Senor!' he cried in desperation from above.

The rudderman gave him a strange look, and tipped him an ironical salute as he lifted his large oar to push away from the canal wall beneath his feet.

Oh right, this is Italy, not Spain. I always mix them up.

It was now or never.

Jamming the Stasis Ward under his threadbare coat, he grabbed the oar and pulled it from the startled ferryman's hands. The latter was too surprised to cry out as he tumbled into the canal waters. Like an Olympic athlete, minus the Nike-endorsed shoes (and steriod-enhanced muscles), he jammed the long oar downwards, narrowly missing the hapless rudderman, and vaulted onto the deck of the still moving ferryboat. Not very gracefully. He staggered and fell as the boat rocked slightly under his landing, dislodging the Stasis Ward from his coat. He looked at a boatfull of tourists, all with mouths agape.

'Er, hi,' he said weakly. 'I'm... the afternoon shift?'

A police cutter raced alongside. The shouted commands were in Italian, but the raised guns spoke eloquently. With a sinking heart he lifted his hands.

'You're under arrest!' cried one of the policemen in English.

Oh, good, he can understand me. "This is just a misunderstanding! Let me go, I promise not to do it again!"

He made to pick up the Stasis Ward, but one of the officers screamed at him in Italian, brandishing his revolver threateningly. The cutter drew alongside and the English-speaking policeman boarded.

"Listen," said Schuholtz. "You know not what you're messing with. Lives will be lost if I'm arrested..."

The policeman paled. "Are you threatening me?"

"No, no!" Sensing opportunity, he dove for the Stasis Ward at the policeman's feet. But quicker than he, was the policeman, who reflexively stamped on Schuholtz's hand as it closed around it.

Schuholtz screamed.

At first the policeman thought it was because of the pain in the man's hand, but Schuholtz then started weeping. "It's broken! Noooooooo..."

He appealed to the policeman: "Let me go! I have to go make another one before the week is up..."

"Certainly not, you're under arrest."

And as he was led away, he was still screaming "You don't understand! The children, all the children; they're doomed now! I need to be free to stop the Heavy One and the Noisy One! Blind fools..."

"What's he complaining about?" enquired one of the other policemen. "He's only going to be away for a few months or so."

...

MOE says that school's still going to resume next week, despite H1N1.

On Time Travel

2009-06-15T05:06:00.001-07:00

I've been reading quite a few compilations of short stories, most of which deal with the topic of time travel. Quite intriguing stories, they are, which stir the imagination and whet the reading appetite. There's only one problem; they all seem plainly improbable.

You see, even if someone found a way to send an object, a time travel machine if you will, into a time different from the present, why, what will happen? A few hundred/thousand pounds of machinery will suddenly occupy the same space that; depending on what you teleported into; is already occupied by matter; millions of air, water or rock molcules. Plainly, matter cannot occupy the same space as other matter. What will be the result? We can only conjecture, but chances are, either the new or the old molecules are destroyed and yield up their energy all at once(because while matter can be made or destroyed, energy can't be made or destroyed). Result: big kablooey /explosion. Bye bye Mr./Mrs. Time Traveler.

One might argue that you can do your time travelling thang in space, so that you arrive in the past in space as well. After all, space is empty, that's why you call it space; you then can avoid all that nasty matter. However, subtle things such as stray asteroids aside, space ISN'T really empty. There is like an average of one atom per cubic centimeter of space.You're basically playing Russian roulette and hoping that particular atom per cubic centimeter dosen't materialise someplace critical and explode, blowing a hole in your craft causing explosive decompression, or even materialising in your skull and killing you.

Yeah this probably explains why human history dosen't have time travellers visiting us from the future (which is what would happen if time travel were a possibility).

Too bad, really.

Increasing Entropy (I.E)

2009-06-08T09:29:00.000-07:00

RGHHHHH. Now i know why Sloth is one of the seven deadly sins. No, not the outback marsupial, but the sheer lathargy that comes with June study break also being a month long holiday in disguise. That's seriously undermining my studies for midyears. Even when I am actually studying my mind seems to have an endless capacity to wander; new and undiscovered flights of fancy, illusions of imagination, dozens of dreams...i end up thinking about something completely unrelated to the chem book in front of me, like DotA, or what my friends are doing atm, or who Wenger's going to sign for Arsenal, or what if I had asked...

I'm sure this is quite common, and i curse the sch admin for giving us our exams after the June hols. Study time is good, but being motivated to use it is another matter entirely. Serious lack of urgency here. Aghh...

World Lit Consultations

2009-06-05T03:29:00.000-07:00

Just had World Lit Consultation
Think I'm starting to be blue
What a strange color, one might remark
What on earth happened to you

Well you won't understand, probably
Unless by some small chance
You're taught by my English teacher
Whose tongue's sharper than any lance

I think your essay lacks effort
It's slipshod work, grammar deficient,
Missing some footnotes, over the word limit
Oh my, those comments are remarkably prescient

It's a draft, a second one, after all
And we had all of 2 weeks to write it,
Seeing how you returned it to us
So bloody f***ing late

It's clearly my fault then that
I was staying up past two
That eyes bleary with sleep deprivation
Missed an error, or a few

The blame also lies on me when
I had problems writing on my essay subject
After all, the fact that she chose it not me
Should have been no object

'English A1 is a compulsory subject; whether
you like it or not you'll have to learn from me'
Well actually I've always loved this subject
Though at the moment that's in serious jeopardy.

...

What a wonderful world this could be
When you're taught by the R.C.
But wait! Don't be too happy
You could have her as your CT.
Won't that be f***ing heavenly?

Beriadanwen

2009-05-12T01:08:00.000-07:00

Long ago in days gone by
A man arrived on Middle Earth's shore
His sword was keen, his helm bright
For he was a Knight of Numenor

Far afield he did range
Exploring the folds of the land
From the Misty Mountains to Mirkwood
Thence to Harad, with its seas of sand

At last, wearied and worn
He chanced upon the woods of Lothlorien
Lo! His doom was sprung; for thence
He glimpsed fair Beriadanwen

Her eyes sparkled in the shaft of sunlight
On her flawless features lingered a smile
Clear was her voice as she sang
Sweet melody flooded the little dell

Alas for thee, Knight of Numenor!
Thou knowest not what with thoust contend
For the beauty of the Fair Folk
No mortal man can withstand

His sword fell from his nerveless hands
Spellbound, for an instant, time stood still
Beriadanwen however, did not
As upon a flint his weapon did peal

Long and desperate was the pursuit
Yet Elvish craft eventually would prevail
Bitterly the Knight wept
For his pursuit was to no avail

Though thence his King had sent him
In search of resource and treasure
Yet in the Elvish woods he had found
Beauty and grace beyond all measure

He knew then that he had failed his quest
Would never return to his King
For he had lost his heart, his love to her
No tidings to his sovereign would he bring

So, laying aside his sword, he vanished into the woods
Thence from the pages of chronicle his fate would sever
Yet some say he did find fair Beriadanwen
And in the ageless woods found happiness forever.

On the off-chance that you will ever chance upon this, Beriadanwen.

Bollywood Dance

2009-05-01T02:31:00.000-07:00

Hey are you going for the Bollywood dance
A friend of mine asked me
Certainly not, said I at once
I don't make a fool of myself just cos' it's free

Come on, it'll be fun, he said
And you get to break a record too
No no, came the reply, instead
of a consenting 'I do'

Nagged it did on my mind though
Though i tried to push it away
It would keep doing so
Much to my dismay

So, I watched the video on Facebook
Albeit quite unwillingly
And realised that what I almost forsook
Was really quite easy

Though, and I paraphrase Cowell, Simon
I can't dance, and can scarcely sing,
The dance looked fun, and most important
Had much room for improvising

So it came about that on that
Momentous and sunny Wednesday
I saw my friend wearing that ridiculous hat
That decked out his (fail) 'Indian' array

And came to be dancing, yes dancing!
In their dance rehearsal
First in the Audi with air so stifling
Then out on the baking Astro

Before long came the real thing
Jittery, and jumped at every sound
Relax, said a voice within
You've got friends all around

(Well that wasn't strictly true
But I was no stranger to self-delusion
Besides, I had King Kev, and Dneo decked out in blue
And they helped maintain the comforting illusion)

So i danced, and danced again
And I had a funny thought
That though my limbs were tiring
I didn't really wanna stop

This dance, which I had almost missed
Due to my shyness for anything new
Was tastier than lobster bisque
Also, it was super cool

At the end of it, I turned to Kev and he said
Disbelievingly 'we broke the record!'
The emcee for the day said wait
Do it again, in case we failed

So we danced, and danced the record away
Oh wait, that's pendin' confirmation
But if we didn't, we won't be too suay
We're at the least in the record books of our nation

Bad Hair Day

2009-04-06T05:04:00.000-07:00

Some gems:

-Your hair looks like the underside of my dog's belly (Jerrold)

-I thought your dog was a white Maltese.' (Me)

-Yeah, but I've recently discovered that this black fungus has been growing on his underside. (Jerrold)

And:

-Now all of you is short (Uncle Edna)

THANKS GUYS. JUST THE MORAL SUPPORT I WAS LOOKING FOR.
Friends like these, who needs enemies right? -.-

Nah jk xD. Still <3 all you guys (:

About respect

2009-04-02T03:23:00.001-07:00

Whatever a person has done, I feel that she (or he) should not be forced to endure such a blistering tongue-lashing from a teacher, in front of all her classmates and two other teachers. It is beyond humiliating. I've experienced it once as a Primary 5 student, and have no desire to repeat the experience. And we're not a primary school, for goodness sakes.

Yes, it is true that she had not listened to the teacher in particular, over an extended period of time. Defiance of authority, etc. And perhaps the teacher was influenced by reports of like incidents from the previous year.

But noone deserves to be driven to painful, humiliating tears in front of people who know you.

To struggle, and fail, to hold it in, and have to leave the class in an effort to retain some dignity.

Or to go through this without their best friend close at hand.

Call me an idealist, but have some empathy please. How would you feel if it was you sitting there?

The Alienated Primer's Lament

2009-03-30T07:57:00.001-07:00

Not so long ago, someone confided in me that he didn't go for Primers parades anymore, given how he had ponned one or two crucial ones and somewhere along the way lost contact with our Juniors, and even the Primers cohort. Making every Saturday parade a waste of 4 and a half hours. Well, JT, this is for you.

To the tune of 'Lemon Tree':

The Alienated Primer’s Lament

Im sitting here in the primers room
Its just another rainy Saturday afternoon
Im wasting my time, I got nothing to do
Im hanging around, I'm waiting for a clue
But nothing ever happens -- and I wonder

Im stoning around on the chair
Im not involved, and it’s not fair
I`d like to change my point of view
I feel so helpless with nothing to do
But nothing ever happens, and I wonder

(Chorus)
I wonder how, I wonder why
Yesterday you told me bout the BB Boy
And all that I can see is just a yellow lemon tea
Im turning my head up and down
Im turning, turning, turning, turning, turning around
And all that I can see is just another lemon tea

sing: da da da da damn dee dab da
da da da damn dee dab da dab deedly da

Im sitting here, I miss the power
I`d like to go out, mix with the juniors
But theres a widening gap I cant leap
So I shrug and I say ‘fuck it’
And nothing ever happens - and I wonder

Isolation is not good for me
Isolation - I dont want to drink a lemon tea
Im fapping around in a desert 12th Coy
Maybe somehow Ill meet another Boy
And something actually happens -- and you`ll wonder

(Repeat Chorus )
I wonder how, I wonder why
Yesterday you told me bout the BB Boy
And all that I can see is just a yellow lemon tea
Im turning my head up and down
Im turning, turning, turning, turning, turning around
And all that I can see is just another lemon tea

Oh I wonder how I wonder why
Yesterday you told me bout the BB Boy
And all that I can see
And all that I can see
And all that I can see is just a yellow lemon tea

EH?

2009-03-28T23:26:00.000-07:00

If ever an advertisment was required for the need to cut down on carbon emissions, the weather for these past few days will suffice. Right now it's hotter outside than Katy Perry in one of her music videos.

Of course, scientists postulate that we have to reduce our carbon emissions by 80% in 41 years time, if we are not to experience 'catastrophic climate change' (ooh alliteration). Coupled with expanding world population, that's like opening 1 nuclear power plant or covering 1 million rooftops with solar panels every week. It can't be done, unless there is a quantam leap in zero-carbon power technology. Nobel prize winning innovations. Like increasing solar panel efficiency by 300% or something.

All this makes my non-participation in Earth Hour more guilt-free. IB students can't afford to have Earth Hour. Except people who have 48 hrs a day *cough*cough* JONNY *cough*cough*. During Earth Hour i was on the computer doing my EE (which will be printed in like triplicate, with 9839283928392839 pages), with the air-conditioning (24deg.C ty) and lights on.

I am such a good friend of the environment.

Backlog

2009-03-25T04:59:00.000-07:00

Word of the day ftw. Strange how a smouldering log left in a fireplace overnight can equate into:
TOK draft 2
EE draft 4
World lit draft 1
History IA draft 3
Assorted worksheets, assingments and practicals (each sold seperately. collect all four; limited edition only. one per customer. refunds not entertained. limited time only.)

Hello

2009-02-28T03:53:00.000-08:00

It's strange how sometimes you struggle to express your emotions in words, and then a song comes along that just resonates with your current state of being. Today was one of those times.

Hello (Lionel Richie)

I've been alone with you inside my mind
And in my dreams I've kissed your lips a thousand times
I sometimes see you pass outside my door
Hello, is it me you're looking for?

I can see it in your eyes
I can see it in your smile
You're all I've ever wanted, and my arms are open wide
'Cause you know just what to say
And you know just what to do
And I want to tell you so much, I love you ...

I long to see the sunlight in your hair
And tell you time and time again how much I care
Sometimes I feel my heart will overflow
Hello, I've just got to let you know

'Cause I wonder where you are
And I wonder what you do
Are you somewhere feeling lonely, or is someone loving you?
Tell me how to win your heart
For I haven't got a clue
But let me start by saying, I love you ...

Hello, is it me you're looking for?
'Cause I wonder where you are
And I wonder what you do
Are you somewhere feeling lonely or
(does) someone love you
Tell me how to win your heart
For I haven't got a clue
But let me start by saying ... I love you

Sigh.

Avatar of Vengeance

2009-02-14T05:25:00.000-08:00

In retrospect, this should have been published on Friday the Thirteenth. And the poem on today. But I thought yesterday was V-Day. Oh well.

'My name is Maximus Decimus Merdidas. Commander of the armies of the north. General of the Felix Legions. Loyal servant to the true emperor, Marcus Aurelius. Father to a murdered son, husband to a murdered wife, and I will have my vengeance, in this life or the next.'

-Maximus, Gladiator

And so another opportunity for vengeance upon my two chief tormentors has come and gone with valentine's day, unindulged in. Briefly, it involved the singing telegrams service and a certain recipient I had in mind, which would have made them the laughing stock of the level for a paltry $6. Even less, i suspect, had I gone through with it and went around taking up a collection from sympathetic people I shall again not name here. Creative, untraceable, and rather damaging.

But no. I let it go.

Not out of any impulse of mercy, mind you. I have very little of that left. If I saw their lives hanging by a thread, the odds are 50-50 that i would just walk away.

No. Out of the fact that if I did go through with my plan, I would be resorting to the same underhanded tactics which they use. Lowering myself to their level. Taking perverse pleasure in masterminding the embarassment of other people.

I wouldn't be able to look myself in the eye after that. Or, as Atticus Finch says, 'go to church and worship God' if I had done so.

'Butif any one strikes you on the right cheek, turn to him the other also'-Matthew 5:38-41

Let it go.

Let it be.

Valentine's Day.

2009-02-12T21:31:00.000-08:00

Glances, fleeting as
the merest whisper
of a breeze on a summer day

Stolen quickly, yet
is love such a crime
that man has to hide away
his turncoat feelings
Lest they
Show

When you walk into the room
When you open up the door
And light up the once-dreary
class once more
with your smile

though it's not for me
yet when i see
the laughter dancing
in your eyes
I smile too, but
only briefly
it's hard to maintain
my disguise
and i have to turn
Away.

Oh, what is it I fear
What makes me tremble when
you draw near
'Grown men shouldn't cry',
but I'm not a grown man
am I, just a boy
who thinks
knows
that he loves a girl

and thinks
knows
that though he may move on
he won't ever
stop comparing
all the
other girls he meets
with her and
finding them wanting

I'm standing here,
wondering if you even
Know

Better Reception Here?

2009-02-11T02:19:00.000-08:00

In more ways than one. This blog has moved owing to some unwelcome attention from certain idiots. No idea where the leak was from; they don't read Kevin's blog; but still.

What a fortnight (lovely word, fortnight. My theory is that it's probably from the medieval era; like some guy goes HAI GUYS LETS GO PARTY IN OUR FORT FOR A NITE COS ITS KOOLZ. But because it's the medieval era, they don't have sms/phones etc, so they put up notices saying 'Fort Night'. And people, erm, notice, and like 10000 ppl try and gatecrash for free mead and food, so the revellers are forced to batten down the hatches and weather a seige, which lasts 14 days. And at the end of it all everyone tells the host, sotto voce; 'I guess a fortNIGHT is 14 days then'. And the host, being as shameless as Ian in terms of admitting mistakes (i should know, i sit by him for HL Math every day), goes 'Of course it is. I KNEW THAT WOULD HAPPEN. Though come to thing of it, his 'HAI GUYS bla bla bla' sounds overly like Kuang as well. So it would be like some weird hybrid Kuang-Ian-guy.)

Wow. ANYWAY. where was I. oh yes. First i found out last Monday that I had 3 days to type out the remaining 2.5k words of my Extended Essay, and that pretty much set the tone for the remainder of the week; sleepless nights fighting leaden eyelids while attempting to organise my essay into a coherent argument with a sleep-addled brain. Playing music at absurdly loud volumes to stay awake, and when even that recourse was close to being brushed aside, singing along as well.

In school, I began to imitate Charlie Buckett in Ronald Dahl's book Charlie & The Chocolate Factory when his family was starving; cutting down on energy-sapping activities such as playing soccer, or even negotiating the 5-levels-each-way journey to the SAC. Unless absolutely necessary, like for lunch. Most recesses were spent slaving at my computer, and fending off a certain homosexual sonofab**** who seems to have it in for me and persisted in sitting next to me one of those recesses and making snide comments. F*** off, seriously. I don't know what I have done to deserve such a complete asshole being in my class. He's been harassing me non-stop for more than half a year. Maybe God's testing me or something. Fine, i can forgive. But I'd be darned if i'd forget as well. I don't think even God forgets. Perfect memory and all. Wish i had one of those, sometimes.

Finally, on Wednesday, after skipping History last period and IA consultation, and staying up until 12+, i finally managed to finish the second draft of my EE. No sooner had I handed it in the nxt day, however, that my Chem teacher dropped a bombshell: assessed practical today , and prac report the next day.

Bugger.

Another night spent burning the midnight oil. Muscles I didnt know existed started to send jolts of pain signals to my brain. Inevitably, i fell ill a week later. Still convalenscing, as a matter of fact. Oh, and my father has a new job, so we had to switch to another doctor whose medical fees were covered under company benefits. A particularly CROWDED clinic, that Monday night.

The next day I went to school, but only stayed there for slightly over two hours. Finished a Bio IA that probably won't be assessed anyway, but didn't feel capable of continuing on with lessons. Since i had an MC, i just walked out. Security is amazingly lax; they didn't even notice me nonchalantly strolling out, though in their defence they were attending to a van that looked a bit like a potential car bomb and which wanted to drive up the main ramp. Spared a few moments at the bus stop while waiting for a bus to see if there would be an explosion. There wasn't. Went home and crashed on my bed, played a bit of dota, etc. A day without school is a good day. Besides, it's the first time i have had some real free time =)

All Tapped Out

2009-01-22T02:07:00.000-08:00

Just a short (pun not intended) anecdote:

I boarded the 74 bus for Buona Vista MRT station, though not without much private grumbling; I had been waiting 20 minutes for a bus and all at once, 3 of them come along, all of which bring me many miles closer to my house. Too bad there's no such thing as 'storing buses for later usage'. Anyway, I was fumbling with my EZ-Link card when some sec3 guy behind me extends his arm forward over my shoulder and taps his card. And due to the circumstances, I couldn't help but see his card balance, which was anything but balanced:

$85.95.

I blinked once, it was still there. I blinked again, and it was replaced by the arcane code notation denoting the current bus stop, that is only comprehensible to senior codebreakers, bus drivers, and Jarrel Seah. But that dosen't matter. I hadn't misread.

$85.95. Nearly $86. Gosh. Isn't that a lot of money to put in an Ez-link card? What would you use it to pay for? A round the island trip with SMRT? With student concession fare you would hardly dent it. A pilgrimerage to every bus stop in the nation? Unlikely, it's 45cents so long as you don't get off the bus. It's just plain silly. The lad's parent, whoever he/she is, is an absolute card.

'Wishmaster'

2009-01-19T05:25:00.000-08:00

I shall try this much hyped quiz lol. iTunes set to shuffle...and...GO.

If someone says "is this okay" you say?

'Smack that'-Akon
Lol wut.
What do you like in a girl?

'American Pie' -Don McLean

How do you feel today?

'Isengard Unleashed' -Well i DID feel like death warmed up this morning, hur hur ><. Stayed up way too late to do TOK presentation

What is your life's purpose?

'What I've Done'-Linkin Park
I guess I don't think about what I'm going to do, but what I've done already.

What is your motto?

'Invisible' -Clay Aiken

Make of it what you will.

What do your friends think of you?

'Astral Romance'-Nightwish

...I'm starting to have serious doubts about this quiz....
What do you think of your parents?

'Say it Isn't So'-Gareth Gates

hahahahahhahahaha they ARE very controlling...

What do you think about very often?

'Arsene Wenger' -Arsenal Away Boys

YEAH ARSENAL FTW. Though right now I'm busy swearing at him for not buying decent defensive cover.

What is 2+2?

'You Don't Mean Anything'-Simple Plan

What do you think of your best friend?

'The Return of the King'-London Philharmonic Orchestra
Well maybe not but I DO value what time I spend with him xD

What do you think of the person you like?

'L.O.V.E'-Ashlee Simpson
Dosen't get much clearer than that, does it?

What is your life story?

'God is A Girl'-Groove Coverage
No idea what that means lol.

What do you want to be when you grow up?

'Holiday'-Bee Gees
A slacker, apparently xD

What do you think when you see the person you like?

'For What It's Worth' -Amber Pacific

What do your parents think of you?

'Pieces of Me'-Ashlee Simpson
True from a Biology point of view! :)

What will you dance to at your wedding?

'Fell For the Girl On TV'-LFO

LOL.

What will they play at your funeral?

'I Caught Fire'-The Used.
I bet I'm gonna get cremated or something....bloody government and their land conservation policies...

What is your hobby/interest?

'1985'-Bowling For Soup

Dead end there...

What do you think of your friends?

'The Escapist'
Ditto.

What's the worst thing that could happen?

'100 Years'-Five for Fighting

If long life's the worst thing that can happen to me I don't really mind...

How will you die?

'Rasputin'-Boney M.
ZO. My. GOSH.

What is the one thing you regret?
'So Much For My Happy Ending'-Avril Lavigne
All the unfulfilled dreams I had, I guess, that didn't come to fruition.

What makes you laugh?

'Accidentally In Love'-Counting Crows

What makes you cry?

'She Is My Sin'-Nightwish

Will you ever get married?

'Dust In The Wind'

o0 that's scary.

What scares you the most?

'Hardware Store'-Weird Al Yankovich
LOL WUT.

Does anyone like you?

'Us Against the World'-Hilary Duff
Apparently someone does, but against the wishes of everyone else o0

If you could go back in time, what would you change?

'Gone So Young'-Amber Pacific
Lost childhood? lol.

What hurts right now?

'Cry Me A River'-Justin Timberlake

What will you post this as?

'Wishmaster'-Nightwish

Sandman

2009-01-09T06:04:00.000-08:00

*Note: The following story is a work of fiction.

Chapter 1:

I peered at my computer screen with eyes that felt like lumps of hot coal. If I just wished hard enough, I found myself thinking, maybe my EE will do itself. My digital clock's phosphorescent numerals slowly pulsed: 2:30 a.m.

Keep dreaming, Seng Wei...

Dreaming, hmm that dosen't sound so bad...almost involuntarily, I looked around at my bed...

NO. Don't let the Sandman win.

It won't hurt to close my eyes, though. Just for a second...relax the back of my head on the headrest of the padded armchair I was in...

I was awakened by the sound of a voice whispering: "Trash, trash, more trash, trash, rubbish, hmm this one's not bad..."

Perhaps awakened is too strong a word. Awakened suggested awareness or interest the surroundings, and right now, my body was sending me signals that went along the lines of:

-Who the f*** cares what's happening, go back to sleep.

-NO. This seems interesting. Eyes, report.

-The bleedin' drapes are clos'd, guv'nor.

-Eyelids! Shake a leg, boys.

-Erm, wrong number.

-WHAT?!

-Mumbai, da? India!

-ARE YOU DEFYING ORDERS FROM A SUPERIOR?

-No speke engleesh. 'orry.

-OPEN UP...

-Sorry, you seem to be fading out, I'll have to call you back lat...

-...NOW!

-Jeez, alright, alright. Gimme a moment to power up and clear away the debris from around the hangar doors...

-That's more like it. Nose, I don't need you...

-A bleedin' lot orf good I'd be, 'ne ways, squashed against this keybo...

-(ignoring Nose) And I don't need Tongue, either. Which leaves... Skin, come in.

-I arf' wish. I'm always on th' outsid', an' it's bloody cold out here with that air-conditionering yer keep setting ter 23 degrees. Haven't yer 'eard that th' mo' degrees yer haf' the mo' edewcated yer are?

-IS EARS THE ONLY ONE WHO DOES WHAT HE IS PAID FOR?

-(Tongue) What ARE we paid in again?

-ATP. Now quit wagging. Skin, I'm still waiting...

-Let's see, Sector 1.1 reports in all systems go, Sector 1.2 has a green board...

-How many sectors do you have again?

-About 10...

-That's not so bad...

-Trillion Trillion.

-If you could just speed it up a little...

-Kaes. Sector 739493894329832....

-I SAID

-(cuts himself short)...known to all as Eppy Demel the Sixth Thousanth Trillion and One, reports a hand on the back of your head. The reception is rather impeded by hair cells, but...

VMMMMMMM

-Hold that thought, the eyelids are coming open.

I opened my eyes. Pitch darkness, and silence, except for the voice still going "junk, random junk, hmm tuesday's looks interesting..." Oh, and the fact that random disconnected thoughts kept flashing through my mind. Every once in a while, it would freeze and focus on a specific one. I recognized one as a dream I had on Wednesday.

A dream...and that strange texture of the hand on the back of my head; rough, gritty...

I sat bolt upright.

"Sandman?"

>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>><<<<<<<<<<<<<<<<<<<<<<<<<<<<

That's all for tonight. My eyes are starting to feel like aforementioned hot coals...

The 7s are Up

2009-01-06T06:33:00.000-08:00

IB results released today, and to my astonishment the level average broke the 40-point barrier. No pressure, Seng Wei. No pressure...

I wondered what it was like down there for those seated as the MC worked upwards through 41-pointers...42-pointers...how it must feel, to be steadily climbing the winding wisp of a spiral staircase; climbingto the absolute pinnacle of delight (45 points) or arriving at the top, only to find yourself falling, to the crushing disappointment of 41 points and below (you know standards are high when 40-pointers don't even get the time of day). The suspense, the tension...especially if you don't have a record of doing well academically...as the number of 'safe spots' dwindle, but the 'rewards' of one of those spots climbs higher and higher.

Like being a contestant on Deal or No Deal, I guess, where the $1 suitcase and the $1,000,000 suitcase remain uncovered to the very end. Only it's worse, cos' you don't even have any control over your own destiny at the point in time, and there isn't even any eye candy to look at (for those who don't understand what I'm refering to, go watch it. You'll figure it out.). X)

Levity aside, what would it feel like to walk up those stairs? All around you, cheering, applause from the crowd, the announcer reading out your name with great theatrical emphasis, your friends in front of you, waiting for the obligatory handshakes before they can fall upon you with cries of congratulation? Probably the closest thing to winning the Champions League Final with the last kick of the game. Move over, Ole Gunnar Solskjaer.

Motivation +10 points. Level up! Your motivation level is now: 2. Inclination to play DotA: -1.

Oh well. 7 points in the bag already. I wasn't confident of that outcome at all; in fact I've lost count of how many people I've exchanged mutually congratulatory high-fives with in the sheer RUSH of getting 7 points for real.

Only another 38 to go...sigh....

Vertical Displacement

2009-01-05T05:52:00.000-08:00

I always find it amusing that whenever I meet Kevin(-not-so-Low-compared-to-certain-people) after a holiday break, he invariably says something along the lines of 'you look taller!'. It's like meeting a favourite uncle.

Speaking of family, and my height (or lack of it), I recently heard from my mother that the relatives at my mother's cousin's wedding (which took place last year in late-october) were surrepitously asking my Grandmother about my apparent stature. Apparently the conversation went something like this:

"Hey, your grandson looks so tall now! "
"He does, dosen't he? It's cos' i fed him fish when I was young!"

If anyone other than those relatives had heard my grandmother's words, and taken a glance at my height, I strongly suspect that they would have sworn off fish for their children for life. As it was, they were probably taking notes as my grandmother expounded on her miraculous formula for vertical growth.

Oh, woe be it to be a big fish (if you'd pardon the pun) in a small pond, a big fish who knows the f***ing Pacific Ocean is next door. You might die laughing. I know I almost did.

Church Incident

2009-01-04T06:10:00.000-08:00

I was with my family at church, Faith Methodist's 11'o clock service, when something occured that affected me profoundly.

As we were starting to sing the opening hymn, the teenager directly in front of us started to behave erratically. He would constantly, despite the periodic intervention of his father next to him, glance around behind him. The first few times this happened, I would notice it with my periperal vision and, given that peripheral vision is not the best, think that he was looking at me. However, after several repetitions, I realised that he was not looking at me, but rather somewhere to my left. With mounting perplexy, I tried to track his gaze (perhaps he was looking at a friend/acquaintance), but to no avail. It was only after his father said something to him, and he replied loudly and with garbled and slurred speech, that I realised that he probably had some form of medical affliction.

As I was resigning myself to a rather uncomfortable service, my mother suddenly bade us to move to another seat, an operation which we carried out expediently. But as I started to make a move, I was wondering what kind of impression we were giving others. Was this ostracism (for this was, without putting too fine a gloss on it, what we WERE doing) of someone handicapped; whether physically or mentally; right?How would the victim feel? His father, who was next to him? Hurt? Indignant? Or worse, resigned acceptance?

But what worried me the most, was that deep down, I knew that I didn't want to sit behind him either. It worries me still.

Random parodied(parodized?) song about goalkeeping

2009-01-01T00:37:00.000-08:00

Most people take one look at me, and ask: why do you play goalkeeper? My response always is: I’m not really sure. But it’s better than watching someone else do it, and cringing while thinking “I could have saved that!” when one goes in.

Parody Of “Not Listening”, By Papa Roach

I’m not sure why I ‘keep anymore

The more I ‘keep the more I see the flaw

I’m not sure why I ‘keep anymore

The more I ‘keep the more I ignore

I’m not sure why I ‘keep anymore

No.

Cos you gotta be bigger

Be faster

Be stronger

If you’re gonna be the best ‘keeper

In this time, to defend your goal line

You hafta be at least six-foot-nine

Guess my hands are, too small for the gloves

No I’m not afraid of failure, I’ve got nothing to prove

I’m not sure why I ‘keep anymore

The more I ‘keep the more I see the flaw

I’m not sure why I ‘keep anymore

The more I ‘keep the more I ignore

The more I ignore

Cause I’ve lost my illusion

I’m a short stopper

Not a Shot-stopper

Always getting chipped by the striker

Dive into the ball’s path

Stretch till it’s unreal

But beyond my reach, the ball is, still

Put myself on the line

But in the end

Become taller I really can’t

Look at Buffon

Or Petr Cech

They are keepers you respect

If you’re vertically challenged, you can’t really choose

No I’m not afraid of failure, I’ve got nothing to prove

I’m not sure why I ‘keep anymore

The more I ‘keep the more I see the flaw

I’m not sure why I ‘keep anymore

The more I ‘keep the more I see the flaw

If you’re not tall, the more they score

But if not me then who

If not now then when

If not me then who

If not now then when

I’m not sure why I ‘keep anymore

The more I ‘keep the more I see the flaw

I’m not sure why I ‘keep anymore

The more I ‘keep the more I ignore

Ignore the flaw, don’t let them score

Ignore the flaw, don’t let them score.

Parody of The Charge of the Light Brigade, By Tennyson

2008-12-30T05:36:00.000-08:00

25-30 X 17 classes = ~500

The Charge of the Light Brigade ( lB )

The Charge of the Light Brigade(lB)
Half a league, half a league,
Half a league onward,
All in the IB of Death
Worked the five hundred.
"Forward, the Year Six!”
"Mug for the grades!" He said:
For the IB of Death
Mugged the five hundred.

"Forward, the Year Six!"
Was there anyone dismay'd?
No aim the student knew
But to get that magic 42:
Theirs' not to make reply,
Theirs' not to reason why,
Theirs' but to school or die:
In the IB of Death
Schooled the five hundred.

TOK to right of them,
EE to left of them,
Finals in front of them
Threaten'd and thunder'd;
Staying up past twelve,
Long they wrote, and well,
To the very brink of death
O’er which they almost fell
Wrote the five hundred.

Shaking off their glassy-eyed stares,
Born of sleepless nights and despair,
Persevering on right then and there
Changing the impossible, while
All the world wonder'd:
Plunged into the paperwork
Born of CAS' and IAs' unsubmit'd;
Male and Female
Reel'd from the exertion untold
Shatter'd and sunder'd.
Then they rallied back, but not
Not the five hundred.

National Service to right of them,
University applications to left of them,
Finals behind them
Threaten'd and thunder'd;
Worried what the results would tell
What future did they spell?
They that had done so well
Back from the brink of death
O’er which they almost fell
Came the five hundred.
All that was left of them,
Left of five hundred.

When can their glory fade?
O the high grades they made!
All the world wondered.
Honor their achievements, their grades,
Honor the Year Six,
Noble five hundred.

Goalkeeper training

2008-12-27T22:31:00.000-08:00

I have just discovered a most effective way of training goalkeeping. Take a water bomb bag; the kind with the string at the top; place a handkerchief, or any other convenient scrap of fabric, inside and seal the bag. Now take it by the string, poise yourself to make a diving save, and start spinning it rapidly in a clockwise or anticlockwise direction. When you're ready, let go, react, and dive after it.
No that's not me, that's iker casillas. Best keeper in the world, imo.

Anyway the beauty of this method is that it is very difficult to judge precisely where the 'ball' is going. You have some control over where it goes by choosing when to let go of the string, but at most you only have a general direction; right or left; and you do not know how fast, far or at what height it will fly. Simulating an actual shot very well; you can 'read' the striker's body language as to where he's going to put it, right or left, to some extent, but you can't predict in what form the shot will come.

Well it's no subsitute for actually being on the pitch, but during the hols there have only been 3 or 4 soccer outings, so hey! It's useful. It's one drawback is that the floor at my house didn't really like my landing on it, so it's was being a bastard and making my landing very painful. Stupid marble floors. Full of flaws (pun fully intended)...anyway. A change of venue was in order. I chose my parents' double bed to dive about on. If a couple of months down the road they complain that the springs are failing, I plan to look innocent and feign surprise.

Little do people realise it, but being a goalkeeper is actually the best position in the world. Instead of hoping that the 10 other players of the team do their best to get the ball to you, you KNOW that 11 players on the OTHER team are doing their level best to get the ball to you. It's more fun, you see more of the ball, and you don't even have to run around. The ball just comes to you. Suits me. Who says you have to be crazy to be a goalkeeper?

Awakening

2008-12-27T04:58:00.000-08:00

Been reading through some of my friends' blogs; and the one thing that struck me was how, well, convenient it was. I mean, instead of having some random thought, or a flash of insight, and then forgetting about it the next moment; just flesh it out here, in black and white. (Yes, I AM aware that the same has been true ever since the invention of a diary, but bear with me anyway. Besides, why would you keep your random musings in something whose alternate meaning is one associated with melamine...sorry bad pun. Probably one of the few things I'm good at.)

Hence my new year's resolution: I will start keeping a blog. I was going to pledge to quite DotA until after final years; but I fear it will be almost impossible...it just never gets old.

Yeah yeah flame me for being a 'dotard', whatever.

Anyway, i've seen some fantastic blogs. Uncle Edna's is regularly updated and always interesting; while Boey's makes me laugh. Nearly died laughing at that bit about the halloween kids and his kinder bueno. A little less funny was his Feburary post; although I wish I had read it earlier; I really didn't know he harboured that much resentment until I asked a mutual friend what was wrong. Hopefully he dosen't feel that way now, although some of his remarks cut a little too close to the bone.

Perhaps I AM socially inept. When you're within the same enclosed all-boys community for the past 4 years, (BB, GEPs) complacency tends to seep in; you don't network, bond with others, etc. Being an introvert dosen't help. When you throw girls into the equation, the meter goes off the scale. Yet, everyone else seems to be settling in alright. Well, not perfectly, but at least they aren't on persona non grata basis with one half of the class, and the dangerous half at that. The half who have the networks and the means to destroy you socially.

Sigh wish I had listened to boey when he was talking about the need to be 'happening'; at about the same time last year. I wish I had been more diplomatic overall. Specifically, around the end of May and the start of June. I wish I didn't have this very inconvenient crush on someone who's about as unattainable as a Opposition Party victory in Singapore.

I wish...

Well it's (almost) a new year.

May it be a better one.

.